This week in politics, something worthwhile finally emerged from the Republican debates as Newt Gingrich told Romney to “drop the pious baloney,” giving the meme-fascinated society something to beat around for a while.
In sports, Tim Tebow averaged 31.6 yards per pass and gained an overnight rating of 31.6, clearly in direct defiance of NFL’s regulation against Tebow’s John 3:16 face paint.
Also, LSU’s football team remains stuck in New Orleans ever since someone put a 50 yard line in front of the bus.
In world news, Dear Leader Kim Jong-il finally sprouted glorious wings of diamond rubies and flew to the heavens leaving a trail of rainbows and purity. Luckily his son Russell, a rising boy scout, has become the new glorious successor.
Finally in entertainment, Cee Lo Green enrages John Lennon fans by changing a lyric in his performance of “Imagine” at NBC’s New Year’s Eve broadcast from Times Square, confirming to skeptics that somebody actually watched the show.